Did I wean Maya? Without even batting an eye?

On Sunday, we spent the day at my cousin’s house in Saint Augustine . We stayed until about 8pm, which meant we had a late night drive back. Jayden fell asleep as soon as we hit I95, but Maya took a long while before falling asleep. I actually couldn’t believe that it took her almost 1 hour to go to bed. As I got home, I wondered to myself for the first time ever if I should skip the feeding. Maya is 18 months old and I still nurse her once a day, in the evenings before bed.

It was past 1opm when we pulled up to the house and as soon as the car stopped, her eyes flew wide open. I grabbed Jayden and Esteban grabbed Maya. We were getting them ready for bed and when Esteban put Maya in her crib, she screamed and carried on. I thought to myself, I guess she’s not going to go to bed without being nursed. So I took care of her, lay her back in her crib and she drifted off into sleep.

A couple of days later, I thought about it again. I wonder what would happen if I didn’t nurse her. It was 8pm and we shut off the TV and headed into the room for our bedtime rituals. I changed Maya first and put her in her crib. Not a peep. Now it’s Jayden’s turn. She got a little antsy when I left the room to take Jayden to the potty, but settled down when she saw me come back with a chair. With both of them in bed, I went to the closet shelf to pick a book and read it to them. They carried on as usual. Jayden coming back and forth from his bed to my lap and asking tons of questions about the book and Maya did all her usual Maya tricks, like saying “A-chew!” over and over again and squealing in delight. Every now and then, she would acknowledge my book reading and say “Wow!”.

“The end.” I said. I tucked them both into bed, put on their music, their fan, said night-night and love you about ten thousand times and left the room. No resistance at all from Maya. The second night, I did the same thing and got the same reaction. Nothing, except for her saying Ni-Ni! I still couldn’t believe that it was over. But now, after the third night, I know it is. And I don’t know how to feel. Should I be happy? Should I be sad? Someone congratulated me. Thank you, I guess. But I don’t really know if I should be jumping for joy or bawling my eyes out because that sweet chapter of my life is over.